Machine Gun Kelly is reflecting on a difficult chapter in his life.

The “maybe” singer, who recently debuted his new blackout tattoo, shared the story behind his ink in a lyric from his new track “Don’t Let Me Go.”

“Just like I wish they would understand me one time,” the Grammy nominee—real name Colson Baker—rapped. “I had a breakdown and tatted my entire body except one line.”

The 33-year-old originally shared the blackout tattoo on Instagram Feb. 20, writing, “for spiritual purposes only.” He also noted in a Feb. 19 Instagram Story that the designed required “44 needles” to achieve and, as he wrote on his tattoo artist’s post, it was full of “joy” and “pain.”

In addition to the his breakdown, the lyrics in “Don’t Let Me Go” also see MGK reflecting on fiancée Megan Fox‘s miscarriage.

“How can I live with the fact,” he asks, “That my hand wasn’t on her stomach when we lost the baby?”